This week’s Cartoon Caption Contest is a bit different in that the cartoon we’re using is not explicitly legal. Basically, this is a cartoon that got cut from my upcoming memoir, LAWYER BOY: A CASE STUDY IN GROWING UP (St. Martin’s Press, July). Counselor Steve Katz drew it…

…and now it needs a subtitle, so your thing.

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So…I just got a cease and desist e-mail from Kenyon & Kenyon LLP telling me I could no longer blog under the name “LawSchoolBlogger.” Being April 1st, I assumed this was an April Fools’ Day joke set up by one of my classmates. Long story short: it wasn’t.

Here’s what happened: I just got off the phone with Kenyon & Kenyon attorney David Darschlaw, who told me that a guy named Phillip Roth, who owns and operates LawSchoolBlog.com, owns right to the name “LawSchoolBlogger” too.

My dad says he’s not so sure that Roth has a valid claim against me, but that this is a battle not worth fighting. So right now, I’m not sure whether I’ll continue to blog under a different name or whether this order is maybe a sign that it’s time for me to stop blogging and focus more on school, the Bar Exam, and promoting Lawyer Boy.

Either way, this will be my last post on “LawSchoolBlogger.com.” So let me say, thank you so much for all the time you’ve spent on this blog. Thanks so much for reading, and thanks so much for all your great comments. In writing them, you’ve actually helped me a lot with lots of things.

That’s all for now.

-Rick Lax

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Greetings, Counselors! And welcome to part 5 of Law School Blogger’s 10-part series: Shameless Ripping off The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest Game.

For those of you new to the blog, here’s how it works: I provide you a drawing and you come up with a funny caption for it. In a few days, I’ll decide who wrote the funniest caption, and then the winner wins absolutely nothing whatsoever. Sound like fun? Yes? Yes.

Today’s drawing comes from LSB cruiserweight commenter Counselor Rachel, and here it is:

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That’s me studying Wills, Trusts, and Estates today.

As you can see, I’m back in the digital camera business. And to celebrate LawSchoolBlogger’s glorious return to the photo blogging scene, I hereby offer you this photocentric blog entry:

On Friday Counselor Laurel rolled into town.

On Saturday we went to a Down The Line rock concert.

After the show, I fixed my left cufflink,

Had my nose picked by Bookstore Girl,

And took one too many photos of Counselor Laurel and H-Lo.

On Sunday I walked up Michigan Avenue…

…to the grocery store.

(Editor’s Note: I also eat solid foods.)

And that’s how I spent my weekend.

AND NOW…the winning entry of the Law School Blogger Cartoon Caption Contest #2…

…is that of…counselor…Lax. Mine. Sorry…but I do think I had the best one this week.

“Ooo…the technological advances in ambulance chasing are amazing.”

Please post your complaints below.

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Hello there, LSB readers, and welcome to part two of our ten-part series: Shameless Ripping Off The New Yorker Caption Cartoon Contest.

Today’s image comes from avid LSB reader and commenter Counselor Ryan.

(Counselor Ryan wanted me to tell you that the thing in the flying guy’s hand is a briefcase.)

Caption away!

(And thanks for all the NY v. Chicago thoughts. They will all be considered in the coming days.)

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Every Sunday I get a chicken sandwich and dinner salad, to go, from Bennigan’s.

I’ve been doing it for about two years now. I always get fat-free honey mustard salad dressing on the salad…or so I thought.

See, there was somebody new behind the bar tonight. Well, she wasn’t new—I had seen her working as a server throughout the past few years—but she wasn’t the person I usually order from.

I gave her my order and told her that I wanted the fat-free honey mustard dressing and she said: “We don’t have fat-free honey mustard dressing. Well, we haven’t had that for like a year-and-a-half.”

“That can’t be right. I’ve been ordering it every week for two years now.”

“You might have been ordering it, but you weren’t eating it. The closest thing we have to fat-free honey mustard is low-fat Italian. You want that?”

Argh.

100 salads x 2 tbsp dressing/salad x 10 grams of fat/tbsp = 2,000 grams of fat I didn’t know I was eating and wouldn’t have eaten had I of known.

So you be the lawyer; what can I charge Bennigan’s with? And what defenses do you think Bennigan’s will have?

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Last week in class my professor broke the students up into discussion groups of three and gave us a handful of problems to work out. We were given 30 minutes to do this. About five minutes into the exercise, somebody in my group said, “We’re thinking about this too hard. It’s possible to over-analyze something, you know.”

“Well,” I said, “the professor did give us thirty minutes to do this stuff, so he probably wants us to do a real thorough analysis. We’ve still go twenty-five minutes, too.”

“But at this point we’re just splitting hairs,” my groupmate continued.

“I think that’s the point of this.”

The third group member agreed with the other guy and we spent the last twenty minutes talking about the weather.

Anyway, the case we were discussing—a real case from the Second Circuit Court of Appeals—had the following quote in it. I’ll give you the quote, you try to guess the context:

“The plaintiff’s Jew is quite unlike the defendant’s.”

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Over the weekend I went to the Hammond, Indiana Horseshoe Casino with my friend Anar. We played blackjack, and I lost $20.

(Shockingly, this photo wasn’t actually taken at the Hammond, Indiana Horseshoe Casino)

Though Anar refused to hit 16s (even against a dealer showing a ten), and though he once doubled-down on a 12 against a dealer showing a 2–he won that hand, by the way–he walked away with an extra $240. So he bought me a martini. It cost him $3.50.

Back to the casino itself. It’s on a boat…only the boat doesn’t go anywhere; it stays docked 24/7.

Now I’m sure the Indiana legislature has some crazy reason for this, but instead of doing the research myself, I figured I’d ask you. I’m not asking you to do the research for me; I’m asking you to tell me what you think the most likely explanation for this crazy docked casino boat law is. (i.e., If they let them do this, why not just let them build a casino in a building?)

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Today I came across this gem of a sentence in my Business Organization casebook. A hearty congratulations to anybody who can explain, in 25 words or less, what the hell it means:

“However, rather than stating positively that exculpation can be granted to protect directors who only breach their duty of care, section 102(b)(7) is worded in the negative; exculpation is allowed for any breach of fiduciary duty other than ‘any breach of the director’s duty of loyalty [or] any acts or omissions to act not in good faith…’”

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As you’ve probably noticed by now, I try to keep LawSchoolBlogger positive and uplifting. Most law school blogs are filled with complaints and gossip…and that’s probably why they’re often so much more fun to read than LSB is.

BUT, today LawSchoolBlogger will be fun to read too because I have a legitimate complaint.

And here it is:

Last class, my professor told us to read from page 345 to page 403. Like a fool, I did. Today in class we only got up to page 365…and here’s the punch line: at the end of class, the professor said, “Try to read up to page 382 for tomorrow. I don’t know if we’ll actually get that far, but read the pages still.”

What the hell?

Okay, LSB readers, let’s say I sue my professor for Negligent Assignment Giving and she comes to you to defend her. What argument do you make on her behalf?

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